Countdown - and coping with the "lasts"

The past couple of weeks have been a bit weird in that I've had a sense that every meeting I've attended has been my last one before moving off to the seminary next year.

And the emotions have been somewhat mixed. On one level I cannot wait to get back "home" with my family, but on another level I'm feeling almost guilty for wanting to leave - especially since many good relationships have been formed this year.

But I think I'm starting to go through a bit of a transition. At our recent district minister's retreat someone asked me how I feel about going to SMMS next year, and my response was that I'm going there to fulfil a promise I made to the church at Synod 2008, not becauuse I actually want to be there. A week ago at our Phase One exit meetings I was still in this frame of mind, but as the end of the year draws closer, I'm starting to warm to the idea of being a full-time student.

Maybe it's the idea of having Belinda and James with me next year that is shaping my thinking, but whatever the underlying cause, I intend to make the best of seminary. And right now, that's a good place for me to be in.